Vince at his office in the RWS Headquarters.
|Affiliations||Running With Scissors|
|Status|| Game - Zombified (Briefly), Human|
Film - Dead
Real Life - Alive
|Played by||Himself (game and film)|
— insult to his mockers
Vince Desiderio is the CEO of Running With Scissors. He first appears on Monday, after several RWS staff members tell the Postal Dude that Vince needs to see him. Once the Postal Dude arrives to RWS headquarters, Vince tells him he is fired and to get a check from his desk. Just as the Postal Dude gets the check, RWS is assaulted by the Parents for Decency, prompting Vince, the Postal Dude and the RWS staff to battle them.
Vince reappears in Apocalypse Weekend, hiring the Postal Dude again to retrieve a Gold Master disc from Bullfish Interactive, a rival company of RWS. After the Postal Dude defeats Phraud Hogslop, the CEO of Bullfish Interactive, Vince invites him to his house to a party with the Postal Babes. Sunday begins with Vince's house being attacked by zombies, so Vince supplies the Postal Dude and RWS staff with lots of weapons hidden in his basement. Later, Vince is one of the many RWS crew to fight the zombies. After the zombie attack, Vince says that he would have given the Postal Dude a ride into town, only somebody blew up his car. This is a running gag in the series, as it is also said by one of the Book protestors who assaulted the Library. Vince later calls the Postal Dude and informs him Mike J has been infected with mad cow disease, so he needs the Postal Dude's help with the marketing. Vince needs media attention that says the "competition's toasted", so the Postal Dude decides to get a Thermo-nuclear warhead from the Terrorist Training Camp.
Vince appears once again in Paradise Lost as the leader of the "Church of VD" faction, which is comprised of the RWS staff and are headquartered out of the old Church. He and the RWS staff rescue the Postal Dude from a group of zombies at the end of Monday. On Tuesday, he offers to help the Postal Dude find and cure his dog Champ of his mutated, gigantic size, if the Postal Dude will perform a series of errands for him. At the end of Tuesday, just as Vince is about to tell the Postal Dude the secret of saving Champ, the Church is attacked by zombies from the nearby cemetery. Vince obliviously walks up to a group of zombified Postal Babes to flirt with them, and ends up being swarmed and turned into a zombie. The zombie Vince Desi then informs the Postal Dude that he is "fired... from life" and then attacks him.
Vince, inexplicably recovered from his zombification (and having his head exploded if the Postal Dude killed the zombie Vince), can be fought as an optional boss battle at the end of Friday during the Apocalypse, after killing the final boss, if the Postal Dude opts to kill all the faction leaders instead of simply escaping the town with Champ. Vince fights with a Rocket Launcher that fires heat-seeking rockets, and is flanked by two RWS staff throwing grenades. Unlike other bosses that fight with a rocket launcher, Vince does not have a secondary weapon for use at close range, and thus will continue to fire rockets even if the Postal Dude is near him and thus will harm himself with the splash damage. Vince also never moves from his initial position behind the Church altar. Vince has more health than Gary Coleman or Osama, but less health than Paradise Lost's other bosses, requiring more than 160 Machine Gun rounds or many explosive hits to kill.
In the Postal film, Vince is revealed to be the true identity of the Krotchy mascot. He attacks Uwe Boll for ruining Postal by adapting it into a movie, but ends up being shot to death by the director when the gunfight broke out in Little Germany.
- Vince Desiderio is the head and founder of the real Running With Scissors, Inc. Vince is also the Postal series executive producer.
- A diploma for anger management can be seen in Vince's office.
- A live-action cutscene of the real Vince is shown in Apocalypse Weekend on Saturday. In an angered state, Vince is seen shouting obsceneties over the phone presumably at another staff member. When asked by the camera man about the Super-fun Pigeon Hunter Mission, he yells "We ain't got no budget for pigeon missions! What the fuck are you kidding me?!"
|Characters in Postal²|
|Postal Dude | The Bitch | Champ | Vince Desi | Mike J | Habib | Gary Coleman | Krotchy | Larry the Crab | Uncle Dave | Osama | Phraud Hogslop | Junkyard Guy | Earl | Rosco | T. Dude, Sr. | Lieberman | Zombie Dad | Easter Bunny | Zack Ward | Big McWillis | Yeeland | Old Man | John Murray | Milo Yiannopoulos | PU CEO | Two-Ears | That Beloved Bookcase|
|Law Enforcement Organizations|
|Police | SWAT | National Guard | ATF | Lawmen | Survivalists|
|RWS Protestors | Book Protestors | Rednecks | Butchers | Carriers | Vegetarians | Food Technicians | Game Devs | Gingers | Bandits | Survivalists|
|Civilians | RWS Staff | Robbers | Marching Band | Terrorists | Priests | Coleman's Crew | Religious Zealots | Postal Babes | Security Staff | Zombies | Skeletons | Cole-Men | HAAT | DEET | Robots|
|Dogs | Cats | Elephants | Cows | Monkeys | Dinosaurs|
|POSTAL filmCharacters in the|
|The Postal Dude | Uncle Dave | Richard | Faith | Verne Troyer | George W. Bush | Officer John | Officer Greg | The Bitch | Krotchy/Vince Desi | Uwe Boll | Harry | Champ|
|Osama | Mohammed | Habib | Asif | Nabi|
|Civilians | Police | Religious Cult|