The Bitch as seen in Paradise Lost.
|Type||Human (Later Demon)|
|Affiliations|| Postal Dude|
Mike J (Paradise Lost)
Officer Greg & Officer John (Film)
|Status|| Game - Determinant|
Film - Dead
|Played by||Victoria Bell (Postal 2)|
Wendy Carlson (Human, Paradise Lost)
Ashley Maina (Demon, Paradise Lost)
Jodie Stewart (Film)
The Bitch is what the Postal Dude calls his unnamed wife. She is an unseen character in POSTAL 2, but is shown in various forms in Paradise Lost. She complains that it was the Postal Dude who insisted in relocating to Paradise for a job at Running With Scissors. During the game, The Bitch would not let the Postal Dude get into the trailer until he has completed the errands of the day.
Originally, the Bitch planned for the Postal Dude to do errands for her only on Monday. However, the Dude is fired, but he tells his wife he is on "sabbatical". As a result, she decides to get him do more stuff for her for the rest of the week. On Tuesday, the Postal Dude has to return a copy of Catch Her in the Rye that the Bitch has been reading. However, the Postal Dude remarks that the Bitch "can't even read". After completing all the errands of Tuesday, the Postal Dude and the Bitch briefly talk about the fate of Gary Coleman after his brush with the Police, and if they would get more money for What I'm Talkin' Bout now that Gary has been gunned down. On Wednesday, the Bitch makes sarcastic remarks on the fact that the Postal Dude bought a Xmas Tree, claiming she "can't wait to decorate it", and that the Postal Dude's voting would affect the future. On Thursday, the Bitch tells the Postal Dude that people are really crazy about getting a Krotchy Doll, and then complains when the Dude spills some napalm over her carpet after he shows her his new Napalm Launcher.
On Friday, after the Postal Dude has completed all of that day's errands, the Bitch asks him if the remembered her Rocky Road, which she told him not to forget on Monday. The Postal Dude indeed forgot about the Rocky Road, and there is no actual place in Paradise to get it. A gunshot ends the discussion and POSTAL 2.
Apocalypse Weekend Edit
In Apocalypse Weekend, it is revealed that the Postal Dude shot himself to stop hearing the Bitch's nagging. He wakes up in the Paradise Hospital on Saturday and receives a letter from the Bitch telling him she has left him and moved back in with her mother. The Dude, however, is unfazed, calling it "good news".
Paradise Lost Edit
In Paradise Lost, the Bitch had lost weight since the last game. She appears during the end of Wednesday when Mike J and her are about to wed. However, upon hearing the Dude's voice, she flew into a rage and attacked her ex-husband. This forced the Dude to fight her and (depending on the player's actions) kill or fatten her. If killed, Mike J will revive her with his "life giving man milk", making her fat at which point the Dude remarks "Now I recognize her".
Later, she reappears with Mike J at the Hell Hole on Friday, attempting to take Champ away from The Dude, leading to a conflict between the two. After several more battles, she transforms into a giant demon, serving as the penultimate final boss in Paradise Lost. When defeated once more, she berates the Dude about their life together, how he was a terrible husband, and how he never remembered her rocky road. The Bitch is then destroyed once and for all by the leftover IED thrown by the Dude.
Alternatively, if the final blow is dealt by the Bean Bag Gun, she will have a change of heart realizing that the love of her life wasn't a Mad Cow Zombie Demon Overlord, but the Postal Dude, and asks him to take her back. The Postal Dude's simple response was giving her the finger and telling her he doesn't "give a damn", so she starts crying and smashing around the place while the Postal Dude escapes and rocks seal off the entrance behind him. It is unknown what happens to her afterwards.
In the Postal film, it is revealed that the reason for which the Bitch never leaves the trailer is because she is morbidly obese. Despite this, the Bitch is still able to cheat on the Postal Dude and to have several lovers, including a neighbor, and Officer Greg and Officer John. Ultimately, the Bitch and her lovers are killed by the Postal Dude, who detonates some explosives he left nearby the trailer.
The character is portrayed by Jodie Stewart, and is credited as "Bitch".
|Characters in Postal²|
|Postal Dude | The Bitch | Champ | Vince Desi | Mike J | Habib | Gary Coleman | Krotchy | Larry the Crab | Uncle Dave | Osama | Phraud Hogslop | Junkyard Guy | Earl | Rosco | T. Dude, Sr. | Lieberman | Zombie Dad | Easter Bunny | Zack Ward | Big McWillis | Yeeland | Old Man | John Murray | Milo Yiannopoulos | PU CEO | Two-Ears | That Beloved Bookcase|
|Law Enforcement Organizations|
|Police | SWAT | National Guard | ATF | Lawmen | Survivalists|
|RWS Protestors | Book Protestors | Rednecks | Butchers | Carriers | Vegetarians | Food Technicians | Game Devs | Gingers | Bandits | Survivalists|
|Civilians | RWS Staff | Robbers | Marching Band | Terrorists | Priests | Coleman's Crew | Religious Zealots | Postal Babes | Security Staff | Zombies | Skeletons | Cole-Men | HAAT | DEET | Robots|
|Dogs | Cats | Elephants | Cows | Monkeys | Dinosaurs|
|POSTAL filmCharacters in the|
|The Postal Dude | Uncle Dave | Richard | Faith | Verne Troyer | George W. Bush | Officer John | Officer Greg | The Bitch | Krotchy/Vince Desi | Uwe Boll | Harry | Champ|
|Osama | Mohammed | Habib | Asif | Nabi|
|Civilians | Police | Religious Cult|