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This article is about the video game incarnation. For other versions, see: Krotchy (film)

"Krotchy ain't got no cojones. Krotchy IS cojones, bitch!"

Krotchy is an animated ballsack mascot based on the famous Krotchy Doll and a recurring character in the POSTAL series. It's said that Krotchy is "beloved by children and Catholic Priests everywhere".

POSTAL 2[]

Krotchy is first introduced on Thursday, but a promotional image of him is seen since Tuesday on televisions at Turdines, the furniture store of Paradise Mall. On Wednesday, during the General Election, Krotchy's name appears on the ballot, as he is running for the position of "Safety Inspector" as part of the Prostitution Party.

Krotchy is so famous that Paradise's mayor declared that Thursday would be "Krotchy Day". One of the errands from that day involves the Postal Dude getting a Krotchy Doll. However, when he arrives at Toyz 'n tha Hood, Krotchy tells him that there are no more Krotchy Dolls available by saying "We all sold out and shit!", but he can get one of the Larry the Crab dolls since there are still plenty of them as they aren't popular as Krotchy. If the Postal Dude sneaks into the store's backroom to get the one Krotchy Doll hidden in the back, Krotchy will fight the Postal Dude personally.

Krotchy is invulnerable to bullets, but can be harmed by explosives or melee weapons. Napalm in particular is super effective. Krotchy himself is armed with a Rocket Launcher and a Shotgun. He fires heat seeking rockets from the rocket launcher, and will switch to the shotgun at close range.

Optionally, you can also just buy a Krotchy doll from him directly by using your money on him or exchange it using a copy of What I'm Talkin' Bout; either of these alternatives will completely avoid conflict.

Regardless of whether Krotchy was killed or not, it's revealed on Friday that he has been arrested and is a cellmate of Gary Coleman. Also on Friday, a group of Krotchys can be found fighting a group of Gary Colemans in a hidden Easter egg arena on the top floor of the Mall.

Paradise Lost[]

TheWiseWang

The Wise Wang.

Krotchy returns for a brief role as both the narrator and as a wise sage, "the Wise Wang". He has holed himself up in the old RWS building and begins the Postal Dude's quest to find and restore his lost dog. He can be found in the CCCP section of the mall on Thursday, looking down at you in the lab from a window. On Friday, he is seen in prison again. He is at the death row along with the Old Man and an RWS staff member.

On higher difficulties, the quest to see him is removed as the Photo quest is also removed due to the NPCs attacking the Dude automatically on sight.

Postal III[]

KrotchyPostal3

Krotchy as he appears in a Postal III trailer.

It's revealed in Postal III that Krotchy survived the Apocalypse and the destruction of Paradise. He now resides in Catharsis, where he runs a health-conscious fast food franchise named "Krotchy's Tossed Salad".

During the Insane Path, it's revealed that Krotchy is in cahoots with Uncle Dave and that his Krotchy dolls are filled with Plutonium supplied by Osama. Later on, the Postal Dude (on the lamb after escaping from jail) asks to "borrow" Krotchy's suit. Not happy about this, Krotchy and his crew of Nerds fight the Dude before being killed. With the mascot dead, the Dude is free to take the suit for himself, becoming Krotchy.



POSTAL 4: No Regerts[]

In Postal 4, Krotchy was demoted to not having a role. In lieu of him, the game has the Dude run around Edensin collecting Krotchy and Larry dolls.

Characters in POSTAL2
Individuals
Postal Dude Jr.The BitchChampVince DesiMike JHabibGary ColemanT. Dude, Sr.KrotchyLarry the CrabUncle DaveJunkyard GuyOsamaPhraud HogslopRoscoZombie DadLeprechaunEaster BunnyPU CEOZack WardYeelandOld FarmerJohn MurrayBig McWillisMilo YiannopoulosTwo-EarsThat Beloved BookcaseThe Other Dude
Law Enforcement Organizations
Paradise Police ForceSWATNational GuardATFLawmenSurvivalistsDEET
Hate Groups
RWS ProtestorsBook ProtestorsRednecksButchersCarriersTerroristsVegetariansFood TechniciansGame DevsGingersBanditsSurvivalists
Other Groups
BystandersRWS StaffBank RobbersMarching BandColeman's CrewPriestsReligious ZealotsPostal BabesZombiesSecurity StaffSkeletonsHAATCole-MenRobotsGimps
Animals
DogsCatsElephantsCowsPigeonsMonkeysVelociraptors
Characters in Postal III
Individuals
The Postal DudeChampVince DesiKrotchyLarry the CrabMayor Chomo40 Year Old Malaysian SlaveboyRandy JonesJennifer WalcottSergey MavrodiUncle DaveLt. DeutschbaggeAlOsamaUwe BollHugo Chavez
Factions
ZombiesUN PeacekeepersBystandersMexi-Sushi ConcernHockey MomsCatharsis Police ForceEcotologistsHobos UnionAl QaedaNerdsPostal BabesPaparazziHell's A-Holes Segway Biker GangEl DEAVenezuelan Army
Animals
DogsCatsHelper MonkeyBadger SawMeth RhinoBees
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